Charity and Virtue for Confidence

 

Confidence in the Presence of God

By President Russell M. Nelson

President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

As charity becomes part of our nature, we will lose the impulse to demean others. We will stop judging others. We will have charity for those from all walks of life. Charity towards all men is essential to our progress. Charity is the foundation of a godly character.

Let us plead with our Heavenly Father to fill our hearts with greater charity—especially for those who are difficult to love—for charity is a gift from our Heavenly Father for true followers of Jesus Christ. The Savior is the Prince of Peace. We are to be His instruments for peace....

Brothers and sisters, as the world grows more wicked, we need to grow increasingly pure. Our thoughts, words, and actions need to be unfailingly virtuous and filled with the pure love of Jesus Christ towards all men. The great opportunity before us is to become the people God needs us to be.

Regular worship in the house of the Lord increases our capacity for both virtue and charity. Thus, time in the temple increases our confidence before the Lord. Increased time in the temple will help us prepare for the Second Coming of our Savior, Jesus Christ. We do not know the day or the hour of His coming. But I do know that the Lord is prompting me to urge us to get ready for that “great and dreadful day.”

In Excess, Every Virtue Becomes a Weakness

 

“Practice Virtue … Continually”

By Elder Lynn G. Robbins

Emeritus General Authority Seventy

“Ye Must Practice Virtue … Continually” (Doctrine and Covenants 46:33)

Virtue is “integrity and moral excellence.”¹ To practice virtue continually requires steady effort with an inspired to-do list. The verbs be and do are a doctrinal pair. Be without do—like faith without works or charity without ministering—“is dead, being alone” (James 2:17). Likewise, do without be describes those who “honoureth me with their lips, but their heart is far from me” (Mark 7:6). The Savior condemns do without be as hypocrisy (see Matthew 23:23; Mark 7:6).

People often have to-do lists and give themselves a checkmark after completing a task on the list. But you can’t earn checkmarks with be. For example, when can you check parenting off your list as done? You’re never through being a mother or a father, which is a lifelong effort.

We practice each virtue (be) through an inspired to-do list of corresponding actions. If I want to become more loving, what ministering actions can I do today to help me become more loving? If I want to become more patient, what can I do today to improve?

When we are at a moral crossroad in life, we often ask ourselves, What would Jesus do? When we do what He would do, we are practicing virtue and becoming like Him. If we go “about doing good” (Acts 10:38), as He did, with each additional good deed, we grow in love and compassion, and they become a part of our nature....

In Excess, Every Virtue Becomes a Weakness

In excess, appetites become corrupt and need to be “[controlled] with judgment, not to excess” (Doctrine and Covenants 59:20). Passions can become compulsive; therefore, “bridle all your passions” (Alma 38:12). Desires can become erratic and fanatical, so be “temperate in all things” (1 Corinthians 9:25; Alma 7:23; 38:10; Doctrine and Covenants 12:8).

To further illustrate, here are a few virtues taken to an extreme:

• Boldness in excess becomes overbearing (see Alma 38:12).

• Diligence becomes burnout or running faster than you are able (see Mosiah 4:27).

• Honesty in excess becomes crass and tactless. This is excusable with children but not with adults who lack the virtues of being thoughtful, kind, and empathetic.

• Frugality in excess becomes selfish, stingy, miserly.

• Tolerance in excess becomes permissive, lax, laissez-faire.

• Love in excess becomes pampering, stifling, crippling, enabling.

Every virtue needs a complementary virtue or virtues, a divine check and balance, to keep it from becoming excessive. Just as the scales of justice symbolize the need for balance between justice and mercy, all virtues need a wise balance with their complementary virtues.

President Ezra Taft Benson (1899–1994) shared this insight about the Savior: “In his life, all the virtues were lived and kept in perfect balance.”³

When people sense their life is out of balance or they are behaving in a fanatical or extreme way, it would be wise to consider what virtues are missing and needed in order to restore balance in their life. Otherwise, a virtue may become corrupted and a strength “can become our downfall,” as President Dallin H. Oaks, First Counselor in the First Presidency, has taught....

The Power and Importance of And

As the “father of contention” (3 Nephi 11:29), Satan cunningly stirs up anger by pitting virtues against one another with a “versus” mentality, such as justice versus mercy. But the Lord “counseleth … in justice, and in great mercy” (Jacob 4:10; emphasis added). These two virtues are not opposites but complementary. To achieve a perfect balance, it is doctrinally more accurate and wiser to say:

• Justice and mercy (as opposed to justice versus injustice)

• Agency and responsibility

• Faith and works

• Religious/covenant keeping (outward) and spiritual/discipleship (inward)

• Uniformity and flexibility

• Unity and diversity

• Letter of the law and spirit of the law

• Reverence/solemnity and joy/sociality

• Boldness and meekness

• Valor and discretion

• Discipline and lovingkindness

• Fairness for all and uncompromising

• Gentleness and firmness

• “Let your light so shine before men” (Matthew 5:16) and not “aspir[ing] to the honors of men” (Doctrine and Covenants 121:35)

• And so forth

Feelings of Confidence

"The Lord has given a commandment in our time that applies to each of us. He has said, 'Let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly.' And with this He has given a promise, 'Then shall they confidence wax strong in the presence of God' (D&C 121:45). I believe He is saying that if we are clean in mind and body, the time will come when we can stand confidently before the Lord.... There will be a feelings of confidence and there will  also be smiles of approval.

God bless us to walk with clean hands and pure hearts and be worthy of His smile of approbation."

Gordon B. Hinckley

Guardians of Virtue

What can each of you do to be a guardian of virtue? It starts with believing you can make a difference. It starts with making a commitment. When I was a young woman, I learned that some decisions need to be made only once. I wrote my list of things I would always do and things I would never do in a small tablet. It included things like obeying the Word of Wisdom, praying daily, paying my tithing, and committing to never miss church. I made those decisions once, and then in the moment of decision, I knew exactly what to do because I had decided beforehand. When my high school friends said, “Just one drink won’t hurt,” I laughed and said, “I decided when I was 12 not to do that.” Making decisions in advance will help you be guardians of virtue. I hope each of you will write a list of things you will always do and things you will never do. Then live your list.

Elaine S. Dalton, “Guardians of Virtue,” Ensign or Liahona, May 2011, 121–24

No One is Watching

"What you choose to think and do when you are alone and you believe no one is watching is a strong measure of your virtue."

Preach My Gospel: A Guide to Missionary Service (2004), 118.

Be Virtuous

“Do not let your passions destroy your dreams. Withstand temptation.

“Remember the words from the Book of Mormon: ‘Wickedness never was happiness.’”

Thomas S. Monson, “Be Thou an Example,” Ensign, May 2005, 113. 

The Standard and the Key

“The standard remains abstinence before marriage and total fidelity in marriage. However out of step we may seem, however much the standards are belittled, however much others yield, we will not yield, we cannot yield. . . .

“You had conferred upon you the gift of the Holy Ghost. There will be whisperings of approval or warning when you have decisions to make. The Holy Ghost can guide you away from evil and bring you back in you have wandered and lost your path. Never forget that you are sons and daughters of God. Satan cannot forever imprison you. You always hold the key of repentance to unlock the prison door.”

President Boyd K. Packer, President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, “The Standard of Truth Has Been Erected,” Ensign, Nov. 2003, 26. 

Teaching Chastity and Virtue

-Teaching and learning should begin early.

“Many children become exposed to sexual content on the Internet as young as 11 years old and some even younger. Entertainment venues, sporting events, advertising, and even social media are increasingly saturated with sexual images and innuendo.

“Some parents rightly ask, “When should I begin talking about sexually related issues?” It depends on the age and maturity of the child and the specific situation. Spiritual guidance will come as parents prayerfully and carefully observe their children’s behavior, intentionally listen to their children, and take time to consider and discern when and what to teach.”

-Teaching and learning should occur often

“Learning is a process rather than a single event. When it comes to teaching children about sexual intimacy or other related matters, people often refer to it as “the talk.” Whether intended or not, this term implies that parents teach this topic in a single conversation. That is not the most effective way for a child to learn.”

-Effective learning and teaching hinges on the relationship between the teacher and learner.

“When it comes to teaching children about sexually related topics, most parents worry almost exclusively about what they should say. While this is important, effective teaching and learning goes well beyond talking and telling about content. In fact, the way parent approach teaching their children may be more important than what they might actually say. Research supports the conclusion that parents who influence their children most when dealing with sexual issues are those who communicate openly, express love and concern, and are actively engaged in the lives of their children.”

-Teaching and learning are most effective when the subject is relevant and real.

“Depending on our approach, teaching about sexual intimacy can feel awkward, unrealistic, impractical, or even preachy. A key to success is to realize that most questions and concerns children have are reactions to real-life situation and observations. As we pay attention to, listen to, and observe our children, we will discern what we need to teach.”

-Learners learn best when they understand what teachers are teaching.

“Rather than speaking in code or even slang, we will have more success if we use correct and appropriate terms. This promotes understanding and cultivates respect.”

-Learners are converted when teachers connect the message with everlasting principles are standards.

“Rather than focusing only on the relevant “facts of life,” effective gospel instruction occurs when we connect those facts with the “facts of eternal life.”

Matthew O. Richardson, Second Counselor in the Sunday School General Presidency, “Teaching Chastity and Virtue,” Ensign, Oct 2012, 20-23.

Change the World

 “Remember who you are.” “Work hard.” “Train for adversity.” “Dream big.” “Winners do not always finish first.” “Run into your marathon of faith and life. Don’t get discouraged by the hills, but see that opportunity in adversity. Go with a sure foot and a sure knowledge that you are never alone. . . . I truly believe that one virtuous young man or young woman led by the Spirit can change the world.”

Elaine S. Dalton, Young Women general president, BYU-Hawaii graduation commencement address, April 14, 2012.